Thank you for all the messages yesterday. Thankfully Bianca was much much better today. I knew that it was likely just some or the other bug she was fighting, but the cancer parent in me questioned why she was suddenly so lethargic. And sadly that's the way it is. We lost the innocence we had such a long time ago. The time where a cold was really just a cold or your child was just having an off day.
The day we found out Bianca's tonsillitis was more than just tonsillitis (much much more) was the day we became "those" parents. Those paranoid, neurotic ones always questioning, always wondering, always assuming it is not as simple and straight forward as a cold.
For most of the time I am doing really well. I mostly refuse to give in to the "what ifs". I mostly refuse to get all stressed out until I really have to stress. But last night was different for me and I did what I really should not have done, I consulted "trusty" friend Google.
Blood tests have become the thing we rely on the most. It tells us if Bianca is doing well. It will tell us if we need to worry. And sometimes the 2 months between hospital visits (and soon 3 months) can feel quite long. It is times like these that it really did feel safe when Bianca was still on treatment and very regularly monitored.
This is life for us and will be for a very long time to come still and today I am once again reminded to be grateful that Bianca is indeed doing really well. That her last blood test results were normal, that she is no different to any other 8 year old.